Inside my head the coast is clear

sköldpadda - my 2nd favorite Swedish word

At the risk of sounding "uncool" and following the trend, I will agree that Gothenburg is a great fucking city.  Gothenburg's industrial and working class roots has led to a pretty defined character that sets the city apart from the posher and seemingly snobbier older brother, Stockholm.  Tattoos and band t-shirts abound, which is a characteristic I can appreciate.

Floating dry dock, which sounds like a perverse sexual position

The older I get the less I identify with the "straight-edge" lifestyle that helped to define most of my twenties, but I still tend to follow the majority of the dogma spit forth by the sXe apostles.  In regards to traveling, this means that my days are not dictated by the next bar stop.  Although I find this generally convenient, it means that you are forced to fill your days with admittedly touristy activities.  A canal tour is actually one thing I would recommend to anyone.  You get ferried around on a boat, see the sights, and usually have a cute local girl narrating the city's history to you in an endearing accent.  Not a bad thing.

Derp

Another bullshit time drain that I wouldn't necessarily recommend (due to the high risk of being seriously disappointed) is visiting the local-strange-shit-behind-glass-museum.  Gothenburg's Naturhistoriska Museum houses the most extensive collection of taxidermy in Scandinavia.  To rephrase that sentence, the Naturhistoriska Museum is home to a bunch of dead animals that seem to have died with absolutely absurd and hilarious expressions on their face.  If, for what ever reason, you are in a deep state of depression and haven't cracked a smile in months, I would drop the cash on a plane ticket to Gothenburg and check out this ridiculous museum.  If you don't laugh at the silly faces on the animals then there is no hope for you.  Just kill yourself already.

Snail - Swedish style

 Maybe it is because I was raised by recovering hippies, but I always find botanic gardens pretty rad places to spend the afternoon.  They are generally cheap (or free) to enter and have a noticeable lack of people meandering around and getting in your way.  I sometimes wonder how the hell botanic gardens stay in business, but I'm afraid that if I draw too much attention to the lack of patronage then the city (or whoever the hell subsidizes it) will get wise and shut the whole thing down.  Regardless, Gothenburg has the best gardens I have had the privilege of lurking.
Other highlights

• nicest hostel I've ever stayed in
• great evening with new found German (and Swiss/Canadian) friends
• rock and roll bar that played local metal